#Twenty People Who Were Never On Television

A revealing rouge’s gallery of individuals who are neither long forgotten nor truly useless but in fact blessed with never having to explain their long stories or short-comings on television.

• Joseph Ames (1689-1759) was an English bibliographer and antiquary. He purportedly wrote an account of printing in England from 1471 to 1600 entitled Typographical Antiquities (1749).  Remembered by some as a man of action who masked his feelings, the phrase "strong, silent type" was used about his person and purportedly was the cause for his typographical interests.
• Mary Beaton (1543–1598) was a Scottish noblewoman.  In 1548, at the age of five, Mary Beaton was chosen by Marie de Guise to accompany her daughter Mary, Queen of Scots, to France. She, along with three other girls who also accompanied the Queen, became known as the "Four Marys."
• Walter de Cantilupe (d.1266) was a medieval Bishop of Worcester and whose name has nothing to do with Empyrean melons, to the best of our knowledge. The bishop held residence at the Cathedral Church of Christ and the Blessed Mary the Virgin in the city of Worcester, itself in the county of Worcestershire, located in west-central England.  It was constructed between 1084 and 1504.
• Geraud Christophe Michel Duroc (1772-1813) was a French general noted for his association with Napoleon. Duroc served in Egypt, Austria, Russia, and Sweden and later honored by being named the First Duke of Friuli, a region in the Napoleonic Kingdom of Italy. A line on the Paris Metro honors the fallen general. Contrary to what our phrase book says, we really don’t believe the general’s name translates to “you rock” – but we may be wrong in this assumption.
• Anne Catherine Emmerich (1774-1824) was a Roman Catholic nun and mystic who was later beatified by Pope John Paul II. A decade before her death, stigmata, or bodily marks corresponding to the marks of Jesus on the cross, was reported on Emmerich’s body. She also claimed in her youth to have visions of Jesus and the Holy Trinity; accounts of these visions were put to paper by the poet Clemens Brentano. 
• Quirico Filopanti (1812-1894): the pseudonym of Giuseppe Barilli, an Italian politician and mathematician who was one of the first to develop the idea of time zones. His hypothesis was to split the earth into 24 areas along the lines of the meridians, each with its own time. Each time zone should differ from the following by one hour, whereas minutes and seconds should coincide. The first time zone should be centered on Rome’s meridian.  "It's about time," he was heard to have said, once.
• Carlotta Grisi (1819-99) was an Italian ballet dancer born in Visinada.  She trained at the ballet school in Milan and was especially noted for the role of Giselle.  The world premiere of this two-act ballet was on June 28, 1841, at the Théâtre de l’Académie Royale de Musique, Paris. It caused a sensation and inspired its reviewers to proclaim Giselle to be the greatest ballet of its time.
• Helvig of Holstein (1260-1324) was a Swedish Queen, married to king Magnus III of Sweden. Queen Helvig was crowned queen of Sweden in 1281, which is the first confirmed coronation of a queen consort in Sweden.  "Holy cow!" the celebrants declared at the feast.
• Isabella of Naples (1470-1524) was a princess of the Kingdom of Naples. Two rumors surround Isabella: that she was the model for Leonardo da Vinci’s Mona Lisa, and she had a secret marriage to da Vinci, supposedly bearing him two sons and three daughters.  And in 2012 she was found to have had syphilis.
• Justus Jonas (1493-1555) was a German member of the Protestant Reformation. He served Martin Luther as a translator, converting works into German or Latin. A long time associate of Luther, Jonas eulogized Luther at his funeral in 1546, leading with the phrase, "Just us...."
• Kempe Gowda I (1513-69) was a chieftain of Yelahanka (now in present day Bangalore) in the Indian state of Karnataka. At first, he called the town (really a van camp) he discovered 'Benda-cal-ooru' which means 'where he cooked his beans';. Kempegowda built the four towers that mark the boundaries of Bangalore.
• Li Bai (701-762): a prominent Chinese poet. He was part of the group of Chinese scholars called the 'Eight Immortals of the Wine Cup'; in a poem by fellow poet Du Fu. Li Bai is often regarded, along with Du Fu, as one of the two greatest poets in China's literary history. Approximately 1,100 of his poems remain today. One of Li Bai's most famous poems is 'Drinking Alone by Moonlight.'  Drink your heart out, George Thorogood.
• Malin Matsdotter (1613-1676): an alleged Swedish witch. Matsdotter was an old Swedish woman of Finnish descent, one of many victims of the witch hunt hysteria called “Det Stora Oväsendet” (“The Great Noise") in Sweden between 1668 and 1676.  She was the only known witch in Sweden who was burned alive.
• Pánfilo de Narváez (1470-1528) was a Spanish conqueror and soldier in the Americas. Narváez arrived on the coast of Florida in 1528 with 300 men among hostile natives.
• Henry Hamilton O’Hara (1820-1875), also known as “Mad O’Hara, is a folk legend from Northern Ireland. Known for his gambling and temper, one story says that O’Hara returned from gaming and his wife would not stand to greet them. He is said to have shoveled hot coals onto her lap with the words, 'Now will you rise?'
• James Phipps (1788-1853), as an eight year old boy, was the first person given the cowpox vaccine by Edward Jenner.
• Judith Quiney (1585-1662) was daughter of William Shakespeare and Anne Hathaway. She married Thomas Quiney, a vintner of Stratford-upon-Avon. The circumstances of the marriage, including Quiney's misconduct, may have prompted the rewriting of Shakespeare's will. 
• Mawlānā Jalāl-ad-Dīn Muhammad Rūmī (1207–1273) was a 13th century Persian poet. Rumi is a descriptive name meaning 'the Roman' since he lived most parts of his life in Anatolia or 'Rum', now located in Turkey.  No word on where Raffi lived.
• Richard de Southchurch (d. 1294): a knight and sheriff of Essex and Hertfordshire. During the Second Barons's War Southchurch allegedly planned to attack London with incendiary roosters.  Talk about being the cock of the walk.
• Guillaume Tirel (1310-1395): chef for several French kings, including Charles V and Charles VI. He wrote a famous book on cookery named 'Le Viandier' that has been influential on subsequent books on French cuisine and important to food historians as a detailed source on the medieval cuisine of northern France.